


A Tale in Online Dating

by ladiekatie



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Getting Together, M/M, Magic!Stiles, Online Dating, Succubi & Incubi, Werewolf!Derek, bouncer!derek, deputy!Stiles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-05 20:33:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13395711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladiekatie/pseuds/ladiekatie
Summary: Stiles' attempts at online dating are pathetic at best. With the addition of his rather.... abnormal knack for magic and solving the towns more supernatural cases, dating is just hard. Now there seems to be a new threat in town and he has a date the next day. What could possibly go wrong?or the one where Stiles is online dating an incubus and Derek has to save him.





	A Tale in Online Dating

**Author's Note:**

> First fic of the yeeeaarr!!! Wasn't really gonna post this, but eh, this is probably the only thing that i'll get up until the semester is over. So this is kind of sort of based on a real date that i had. I went to a bar with a guy i met online and the bouncer at the bar was way cuter than the guy i was on a date with. So obviously i daydreamed about the bouncer rescuing me from the pitiful date. 
> 
> This isn't beta'd even though i was gonna really try to at least look it over, but eh. I failed tagging 101, so if there is anything you think should be tagged in this fic that isn't already, let me know!
> 
> Enjoy!

Stiles doesn’t know why people swear on online dating. It’s annoying. Talking to a new person every week, forcing enough conversation to ask for a real date, then going on that real date and realizing that you’ve either been catfished or the person sitting across for you if the embodiment of a limp dick. Stiles is just  _ over it _ . He’s ready for something real. Something that he isn’t going to be able to find from swiping left and right endlessly. 

That seems like such a pipe dream at this point though. Considering how much of dating has moved from real life to online, finding someone in the real world seems almost as absurd as online dating did a few years ago. 

His phone dings from its place on his desk. The cheery notification announces that he has a new message waiting for him in one of the many dating apps he has installed at this point. It’s from a guy named William he started talking to a few days ago. 

Stiles is well aware that creating too much hope for himself will only lead to more heartache when he finds this William guy to be too good to be true. He's already getting catfish-y vibes from the dude. Like really? Who volunteers for the peace corp for 5 years while going to vet school and taking care of his kid sister? Stiles is already calling bullshit. 

Still, there is a tiny bud of hope that this guy is the real deal. That he is as sensitive and truthful as he claims. That the abs that are part of his profile are actually his and that when they meet on Friday there won’t magically be a beer gut there instead, with the excuse of ‘that’s an older picture’. 

William

Good morning :)

Still, getting good morning texts is nice. 

Stiles

‘morning. Sleep well?

William

yeah, getting ready to go to the gym

Stiles

I’m already at work :/ Smith called in sick

William

That sux.

And this is where the lull comes. What is he supposed to say now? There is like.. Nothing to say. Thankfully his father pokes his head out of his office. “Stiles, come here.” 

_ Oh thank God.  _

Stiles

have to go, my boss just called for me.

Okay so he hasn’t told the guy his father is the sheriff, he feels like that is second date type conversation. 

William

Hope you’re not in trouble.

Stiles

Nope, probably just getting my assignment for today. Talk later?

William

of course cutie

The text sends warm and fuzzies into his stomach. He tries really hard not to make it a bigger deal than it is. Stiles tosses his phone in his desk drawer and makes his way across the bull pen to his father’s office. 

“Gooood morning daddio, whaddya got for me today?” Stiles slips in and closes the door when he father motions for him to do so. Which probably means that whatever they’re going to talk about has to do with what goes bump in the night rather than business as usual sheriff stuff. 

“Smith didn’t call in sick today son,” the sheriff pulls out a file from behind his desk and opens it to show Stiles it’s contents. 

“Okay?” Stiles takes it and gets the answer to his questions before it’s even asked. Pictures of Smith laying in a bit of field in the preserves, naked, and looking distinctly deflated. “What is it?” Stiles asks, already skimming through more pictures trying to find another clue as to what killed the deputy. 

The fact that he seems drained of blood makes Stiles’ mind go to vampire. However, that is ruled out immediately because the nest that was here last year promised that Beacon Hills wouldn’t never have an infestation again. Thanks to Stiles. Stiles clutches the paper, focusing on trying to see the body. He closes his eyes and the landscape from the picture forms in his mind, he knows if he wasn’t wearing a long sleeved shirt his tattoos would be glowing. 

Slowly the body and its surroundings come into view. Stiles walks around it, and tries to get a better look at what could have done this. It’s no use though, what he’s seeing isn’t real, and he can’t get a good enough view or feeling to distinguish anything. 

“Where is his body? I need to look at it to get a better read on what did this,” Stiles pulls out of his mind, and puts the photos back in the folder and hands them back to his dad. The information from the report already in his head. 

“It’s at Deaton’s. He’s waiting for you,” his father says. The sheriff gathers the file back as Stiles nods and turns to leave the precinct. 

The vet clinic is probably the last place most people would keep a murder suspect’s body. However, Dr. Deaton is no ordinary vet. The vet is just a cover business, one that allows him to gain access to all the medical tools that he needs in order to take care of the more supernatural components of the town’s populus. Particularly covering up mysterious deaths. It gets a little hard to explain how someone died when they have their heart ripped out, or they are missing eyes. Deaton makes those go away. 

The clinic is busy when Stiles arrives in his cruiser. The receptionist knows about the true nature of the clinic and buzzes him right in past the mountain ash barrier into the back. Scott is in one of the exam rooms, actually examining a cat that looks like it’s seen better days. Stiles passes by to the Deaton’s office. 

“Hey Deaton,” he greets as he opens to door to slip inside. Deaton isn’t the most conversational person in town, but he does the work that needs to get done. 

“One moment Mr. Stilinski,” he’s typing something out on his computer, not looking up to meet Stiles’ gaze. 

“Mr. Stilinski is my father, Deaton,” Stiles reaches up to scratch at his chin, noticing a slight layer of stubble, he’ll have to shave soon.

“Your father is Sheriff Stilinski, Mr. Stilinski,” he counters. Deaton’s dry humor does make him laugh sometimes. 

“Then by that logic, I’m Deputy Stilinski,” Stiles replies, he knows he’s won this round. 

“Fine,  _ Deputy  _ Stilinski, I’ll be just a moment longer.” Deaton still hasn’t looked up from his computer, and he’s typing furiously. Stiles takes a seat in one of the chairs which is obviously meant for owners when Deaton is giving them bad news about their fur child. 

Stiles pulls out his phone, and sees that there is a couple of notifications from another dating app that he has going right now. These messages are from a girl named Lauren. She seems nice enough, though she made some biphobic jokes that Stiles can’t tell if are legit or just awkward attempts at humor. One more slip up though and Stiles will either ghost her or give her lecture. 

He reads her message and responds with a general reply of being busy at work, not really in the mood or position to be talking to her right now. 

“All right, follow me Deputy,” Deaton moves around his desk, and Stiles gets up to follow him to the room off of his office. It’s obviously not hidden, but it’s still not the most obvious room in the clinic. Inside is the mortuary. It’s small, it only has four freezers.Though unfortunately there have been times when four fridges weren’t enough. 

“I’m sure you know the circumstances which Deputy Smith was found,” Deaton says as he moves to the one on the far right. Stiles doesn’t say anything as he follows, hands shoved in the pockets of his issued department jacket. 

“Yeah, I saw the report,” he answers as the drawer opens and out comes Smith’s body. 

It looks flat, and seeing his cheeks sunk in and eye hollow is nothing like the guy that taught Stiles a lot about what it is to be a deputy. Stiles walks around the edges, Deaton moves out of the way, letting him do his work. The body isn’t as fresh as it should be for someone who just died. If they time frame they have is correct, Smith has only been dead for no more than 24 hours, yet his skin is already flaking away. 

Whatever got him is something Stiles hasn’t seen before. 

“I have to touch him,” Stiles says. Deaton knows this, it’s how he gets his best results. Touch is a powerful thing. 

“I’ll leave you to it,” Deaton says turning to leave the room. 

Stiles doesn’t bother responding, knowing that neither of them are very comfortable with the situations they’re put in. Stiles looks at the body of his friend, and thinks about the fiance he has at home and how Stiles is probably going to have to lie to her about what happened to her soon to be husband. Geez the wedding is only a couple of months away. 

“I’m so sorry Tim,” Stiles says. He can’t hear him, he knows. What he’s about to do is insanely invasive and something he hates, but it’s what he has to do. Stiles locates the lesions that most likely lead to his death, pressing two fingers right near wounds. 

He pulls the energy from it, trying to see, to feel what happened, what did this. 

What he feels isn’t what he expected. He feels cold blood rushing out. Stiles pulls away, so a vampire drained him, which justifies his current state, but he was already dead when the vamp found him. So who killed him? And why was there a vamp in the area?

Stiles moves up to his face, looking for anything that would suggest what did this. 

“What happened to you Tim?” He asks, putting his hands on his eyes, to maybe see what he saw. He focuses again, trying to push into his eyes without thinking how squishy and gross this really is. 

A man. An Alley. Then a bed? 

“No Tim. Where you cheating on Christine?” Stiles says, moving his hands to Smith’s lips. WIth another force of magic he pushes into his lips, and feels it. Life force being pulled from there, deep from his toes and his belly and his brain all coming together and leaving. Panic, he can feel the panic and the fear, the worry. 

Stiles pulls back and tries to piece together what he just felt. He pulls out his phone and does a quick google search for creatures that suck the life from their victims. The wikipedia page that he pulls up is longer than his arm. 

He shoves his phone in his pocket, knowing what needs to be done but really not wanting to do it. Stiles is definitely going to ask for a raise after this. The cloth that is covering his groin is neatly folded and very sterile looking. Stiles notices that Smith is nearly matching the paleness of the white cloth. 

With a deep breath, and a small ask of forgiveness he lifts up the sheet and touches one of his greatest friend’s dick. 

 

“It was an incubus,” Stiles says into his phone as he walks out of the vet clinic. “But there is a vamp in the town. I don’t think they’re eating live, but he was drained by a vamp for sure.” Stiles walks to his cruiser and slides in, still not believing what he saw. He asks for forgiveness one more time. 

Now that they know what they’re looking for, they can actually start looking for suspects. They’ll start with a run of his phone records, to see if he knew who the incubus was. Stiles wonders how they’re going to write off his death, and how he’ll tell Christine. 

 

With all the chaos today, it’s easy for Stiles to forget his pathetic attempts at dating. His phone is a mess of unanswered texts. A few were from the girl he was talking to earlier, about how she doesn’t need to be in a relationship where the man can’t pay her attention and other things that Stiles hopes she is going to a therapist for. 

William though, seems to understand that he has a job to do, a town to protects. Stiles welcomes his invitation to meet up sooner. They plan to go to a new bar near the edge of town, which is convenient for Stiles because he’ll be able to do a little surveillance of the place, because that is the last place Smith’s phone pinged. 

Stiles heads to his tiny apartment and changes for his date. He’s kind of really nervous. The amount of people he talks to a day on the various apps never really end up in something like this. Even if they did, they usually end up with someone bouncing out early. Stiles finds himself really not wanting to fuck this up with William. He seems like a great guy. 

The drive to the place is a little daunting, but his jeep gets him there just in time to see another car pull up right after him. It’s a sleek  red mustang, Stiles recognizes it from the few profile pictures William has on his profile. Butterflies form in his stomach as he pushes open his door to meet his date for the night. 

William sees him right away, and jogs the short distance between them. Stiles is so relieved to see that he looks just like his profile pictures. 

“Hey,” he says, moving in to give Stiles a hug. 

“Hi,” Stiles lets him, and it’s a good hug, damn he hopes this works out. 

“Shall we?” William asks pointing to the entrance of the bar. 

“We shall,” Stiles replies, feeling like a fucking teenager rather than the 28 year old he is. 

They walk to the front door where a little bit of a line is waiting to get in. They chat idly about while they wait to make it to the front of the line. Stiles tells William as much as he can about work, he makes not bring up the supernatural on the first date a huge deal. The last thing he needs is to try to explain to his dad why he had to cast a memory spell on someone, again. 

Slowly the lines gets shorts as they move up. Stiles noises the bouncer, a huge guy that looks like he can lift a tree with his bare hands. He look wild, with a beard that hasn’t been taken care of in a while, and a head of hair that makes Stiles feel like the dude is better suited for life as a lumberjack rather than a bouncer. He’s hot, and if Stiles weren’t here on a date, he’d probably embarrass himself by asking for his number. 

The guy growls,  _ growls _ as he lets them in. Stiles sees his eyes flash blue, but he lets it slip because he definitely isn’t going to interrogate why this werewolf if in his town without letting the local law enforcement know. 

Stiles wonders how Smith died with a werewolf on watch. 

They must be working together. The thought scares Stiles, because from the research he did today, incubus were usually solitary creatures. Their feeding habits didn’t allow them to cohabitate with anyone, at least not for an extended period of time. So if a werewolf and an incubus were teaming up, that would be pretty scary. 

Stiles tries to push that thought out of his mind, ya know, he is on a  _ date _ after all. Work can wait. 

They find a spot on the bar and sit. William orders drinks and they get to talking. The atmosphere is definitely a little louder than Stiles would have liked, but William says he really likes this place, that the crowd is good and the people are fun. 

William is a freelance photographer, so Stiles asks him about that and what it’s like traveling the world.

“It’s really great, until you realize that you want something more. Something permanent. It’s hard to make lasting relationships when you’re constantly leaving,” it’s cheesy as fuck but something in Stiles can’t resist it. It’s like a damn romcom, because as soon as he finishes, Stiles finds himself leaning in for a kiss. 

Next thing Stiles knows, they’re in the alley behind the bar, William has Stiles pressed up against the wall and it’s  _ everything _ Stiles wanted. This is it, this is what he’s been waiting for. William has his mouth in the crook of Stiles’ neck, and it’s amazing. Stiles never wants to leave from this spot right here. 

“Let’s get out of here,” William says and Stiles is very much on board with that plan. All he can do is nod, knowing he probably looks like smitten with his kiss swollen lips. William just smiles and it’s devious and amazing, and  _ perfect. _

Suddenly, William isn’t in front of him anymore. Instead, he’s on the ground twenty feet away and the bouncer, the  _ werewolf _ bouncer, is growling. He’s standing in front of Stiles while William stands up. 

“Calm down fluffy,” William says, an accent suddenly present that hasn’t been there all night. “I’m just taking my date home for the evening.”

“Yeah like you took that guy yesterday? Found him dead in the preserves this morning,” The bouncer has his teeth and claws out, Stiles can’t see, but he knows his eyes are glowing. 

“What is going on?” Stiles asks, worried more about William than what is going on with the werewolf. 

“Get out of here,” the bouncer says. 

“Ummm, no?” Stiles says lifting his own hand to form a ball of light. It’s just that, a ball of light, but it’s enough to scare someone. They’ll never know he’s bluffing. 

“What the fuck? You’re a mage?” William asks from he spot a few feet away. 

“Yes, is that a problem?” Stiles asks, worried that this isn’t a good time to share that little nugget of truth. “Wait, how do you know what a mage is? Or a werewolf for that matter?” Stiles asks, suddenly more alert than he was a few moments ago. 

“He’s an incubus,” the bouncer says, moving to all fours as his arms change from human to something else. 

“What?! Really? Fucking hell, I am  _ so done _ with online dating,” Stiles exclaims. He turns the ball of light in his hands into a stunning spell and hurls it at the Incubus just as the werewolf lurches forward. The spell hits him first and the wolf uses his claws to bury into his body.

Stiles pulls out his phone to call his dad, and to call a clean up crew to get rid of the body. At least that is dealt with. 

It’s only a matter of a few minutes before his dad is on the scene, discreet enough not to bring attention to the incident. The bouncer has stuck around to explain why he was in the town without letting the police know, and to give a statement about the incubus. The death will be written off as a runner. William is charged with Smith’s death, and split town afterwards, that’s what Stiles will tell Christine. 

William’s body is taken into Deaton’s to be examined and dealt with properly, Stiles remains at the bar waiting for the scene to disperse a little before going home to his empty apartment and his even more empty bed. 

“Do you only date online?” Comes a voice from behind him. Stiles turns to see the bouncer, shifted back into his human form and wrapped in a blanket after he shredded his clothes earlier. 

“What?” Stiles doesn't understand the questions. 

“Earlier,” he smiles, and even though there is a lot a hair around it, it’s endearing, “you said that you were done with online dating, would you be interested in maybe, real life dating?” 

“Are you- um- are you asking me out?” Stiles asks, because the last thing he needs is to be confused right now. 

The werewolf just nods, but the smile is still on his face. 

“Well you already know my big secret, and I already know yours, so this is already more serious than anything i’ve ever had,” Stiles says walking closer to where the guy is standing. “Stiles,” he puts his hand out. 

The werewolf sticks his own hand out, dropping his blanket in the process, “Derek.” 

And based off of what Stiles sees before Derek can get his blanket back in place, this has the potential to be a lot of fun. 

**Author's Note:**

> So? What did ya think? Leaving comments and kudos is like sending me $10 million. 
> 
> If you like the text interface i used, good news! I made that! [And I have a whole page about how you can do it too!!!](http://ladiekatie.tumblr.com/ao3-skin-intro) All i ask, is if you do use this in your own work you give credit where credit is due, this took me nearly three months to figure out and i'd like the credit. 
> 
> while you're at my [tumblr,](http://ladiekatie.tumblr.com/) stop by and say a quick hello!
> 
> This is something i call a Half Baked Fic, which means I have no intentions on continuing this fic past this point.
> 
> I failed tagging 101, so if there is anything you think should be tagged in this fic that isn't already, let me know!


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